I have a house (and manage to pay the mortgage), I am married with children. I even work! Yet a part of me is forever young. I don’t mean in a crazy, fun teenager way, forever out clubbing and getting drunk. No, my kind of ‘young’ is more gawky than that, about 12 years old I’d say: A little socially awkward, not quite learned when I should keep my mouth shut and constantly feeling that I’m worthy of praise for being so grown-up.
Surely I deserve a medal or gold star for consistently getting my children to school on time, or owning cake tins and Tupperware? Remarkable feats for a 12 year old indeed. When life gets too much, it is understandable; I should be focusing on simple things like pony riding and who my best friend is.
Many of us feel we are playing a part in life, it’s the classic imposter syndrome where we feel our luck will run out and someone will eventually work out we are a fraud.
I hope I’m not alone, so I’ve devised a quiz to work out what stage of life you are truly at. Let me know…
What do you think when you’ve been invited to a party?
- I wonder how much booze there will be.
- Whether I will get home for bedtime.
- Whether my best friend is going.
What is your writing like?
- It’s a bit of a scrawl because I normally use my phone.
- Slanted and flowing.
- Round and bubbly, possibly with hearts over the ‘i’s
How many items in your house have been purloined from your parents’ home?
- 1 or 2, maybe just some of my old toys from childhood.
- None, I’ve bought everything myself.
- More than 5, including nail clippers, kitchen scissors, recipe books, laundry baskets and a funny egg timer thing.
What’s your favourite sandwich?
- Cheese and chips.
- Smoked salmon and cream cheese.
If you broke your leg tripping over in the street, who would you want to visit you first?
- Your partner or best friend.
- Your lawyer.
- Your mum.
What did you think when you watched Frozen?
- It was a necessary update of the ‘every princess needs a prince’ cliché.
- I’ve never watched it.
- So beautiful, made me cry.
What time do you like to go to bed?
- About 1 am but sometimes later.
- Lights out at 11 pm after reading.
- Before 9.30 pm.
How do you find quizzes like this?
- Just a bit of fun.
- Totally ridiculous, I don’t have time for them.
- I do loads of them, they are so insightful.
You are a teenager – up for having fun but streetwise and no one is going to tell you what to do.
You are middle aged – sensible and practical your idea of having fun is to drink slightly more than the government’s recommended units of alcohol (by consuming good quality wine).
You are twelve – just on the cusp of puberty you don’t really know who you are but that’s ok unless you have to make any big decisions in which case you may cry.